Friday, October 6, 2017

Mistress Saya is in the House: When the submissive must become the Dominant

It's been a while since I've posted here. Busy life and booming business are the culprits. But sometimes life catches up to you and smacks you in the face. This is the story of one of those times.

When the dominant partner is facing a health issue, sometimes the submissive has to assume the Dominant role.

Sir's blood pressure has been minimally elevated for several months. In an effort to avoid medication, we have been (with the doctor's blessing) using diet and exercise to keep it under control. In addition, Sir is supposed to have been taking his blood pressure on a regular basis.

One thing I learned very early in our relationship is to back off and not nag - especially about health issues. While I don't nag, I definitely check in - occasionally. But I'm also very observant. I was an EMT, later a paramedic, and even later a physician's assistant. One thing you learn is how to hear what isn't said.

I'd noticed that Sir was complaining of being tired, even after sleeping for sometimes 14 hours out of 24. "It's just pressure at work." Yes, he's been working 55-hour weeks in divided shifts, so he hasn't been getting eight straight hours sleep. Even so, I've been making sure he gets plenty of sleep on the weekends. Not the most ideal situation, but he said he was fine. Still, the caution flag was flying.

He's also put on some weight, but he's also insisted it's from grabbing fast food on the run. I put my foot down and insisted that he take food from home. Even leftovers are better than most fast food and take-out. The caution flag was still flying, but I was now being even more observant.

And he was snoring worse than usual, which was driving me to distraction. "It's just pollen and allergies," he said. The caution flag was flying until I actually stayed awake and listened to his snoring. This wasn't just the regular type snoring. No, this was stridorous. Harsh, deep, choppy, and there were periods of full-on apnea. Now the red flags were flying, and I was turning into a nag. He wasn't happy.

You guessed it. I went on the warpath. I tried everything to get him to the doctor. No luck. Men are notorious for avoidance when it comes to dealing with health issues. It's one of the things that we were taught in paramedic training and definitely in med school. Women may be stoic, but men are tight-lipped, and machismo is the name of the game.

And then I pulled the logs from the wrist and arm BP cuffs. His blood pressure had been steadily increasing. Even in the face of everything we had been doing - or I THOUGHT we had been doing - to get it down.

Long story short...

On Wednesday, I cornered him and took his blood pressure myself from the wrist and upper arm. As I watched the readouts, I noticed that the pulse monitor was irregularly irregular - alarmingly so - and the pulse rate recorded was in the mid-50s. His resting rate is in the mid-60s. I took out the stethoscope and listened to his heart for a full 60 seconds. And the rhythm was all over the place. I took his BP manually and it was definitely elevated 155/93.

The red flags were flying high and hard, and I was not taking no for an answer. But he didn't know that - yet.

Thursday morning: While he was still asleep, I took his pulse. Rhythm still very irregular. Woke him up at the regular time, let him get his eyes open, and then brought the wrath of Saya on his head. He was going to meet me at the doc's office or I was going to drag him out of his office by his ear in front of his coworkers.

Mistress Saya was in the house.

Doc diagnosed possible sleep apnea, hypertension, cardiac arrhythmia, and ordered up a battery of tests. And even then, Sir tried to minimize.

Mistress Saya (quietly) flipped her shit in front of Sir and the doc (who is someone I worked with back in the day). And Doc looked Sir right in the eye. "She's tough. Listen to her. She probably just saved your life."

Switch the scene to after work last night. Sir was still trying to do the "I'm impervious to everything and stronger than steel" act. Oh, so not working, because when her Dom is in distress, God and all his angels had better not get in Mistress Saya's way. My exact words:

"Now hear this: From here on, we are doing this MY way. Your body is trying to tell you something, and I seem to be the only one listening. You're gonna sit up and take notice. SA is dangerous. And Mr. Macho, you are NOT going to have a heart attack or stroke on MY watch. Suck it up, buttercup."

Yes, Mistress Saya is in the house. And she knows how to throw a whip.