Arrival: Under the hands of Master and Mistress

I couldn't believe it was actually happening.  We were going to La Domaine Esemar.  Wow, just plain wow! 

Me being me, I dug up everything I could find on the place.  Reread every word on the website.  The revamp was complete and there was a whole lot more information.  Then, I checked out Master R's and Mistress More's pages on Fet (Master_LaDomaine, Mistress-More) and started putting out feelers.  I had read Master R's book and read it again. 

The BDSM community always plays things very close to the vest out of necessity.  Getting information was a little difficult, but it quickly became clear that LaDomaine was very highly regarded in the BDSM community, not just in the US, but all over the world.  The Masters, Mistresses, Dominants, submissives and slaves trained at LaD are, indeed, very highly regarded and sought after.  By the time I called for my interview and to set things up (per Sir's instructions), I felt like I had a pretty good idea of what to expect.  Or so I thought...

I interviewed with Mistress More. 

I had heard stories about Dom/mes and Mistresses/Masters who could almost read minds because they had such heightened perception.  I had read BDSM fiction and the Masters/Mistresses/Dom/mes were always portrayed as "all-seeing, all-knowing".  Sure, the dominant partner would have to know their submissive pretty well – in fact, much better than most.  After all, let's be real here, the play is dangerous.  Being acutely tuned in to the submissive/slave's reactions, both physical and psychological, is imperative.  The dynamic between a Master/Mistress/Dom/me and their submissive/slave has very deep psychological implications as well.  This is not something to be entered into or taken lightly.  It is based on absolute honesty, and complete, unreserved trust.  "Honesty", "trust", "open communication" are terms that are thrown around in a very cavalier manner in today's society.  Within the BDSM community, however, these are taken very seriously. 

My interview took place over the phone and lasted over an hour.  The questions were pretty generic.  What do you expect?  What do you hope to gain from this experience?  How extensive is your experience, if any, with BDSM?  What is your relationship dynamic?  Do you live it or do you just play?  The details of the interview are not necessarily germane here.  This type of interview would be unique to each person.  What I found mind-bending about the experience was Mistress' ability to pull things out of me I would never have told my priest, doctor, or therapist, and had only just barely been able to talk about with DH/Sir.  Somehow She had breached my mental walls before I even realized what had happened.  And we hadn't even met yet.  I remember thinking that She would have made a brilliant therapist. 

Sir's interview was next and happened about three days before we left.  I wasn't present and, to this day, I have no clue what was discussed.  I do know that He seemed a little preoccupied afterwards, but I put it off to finishing up stuff at work before going on vacation and getting ready for the trip.  The only thing He did say was that He had a "surprise" for me and wouldn't give me so much as a clue.  I am not a fan of surprises.

April 18^th arrived and we hit the road.  The drive up I-81 and I-84 was beautiful, but as the day wore on and we got farther and farther north, the weather became colder and then we picked up rain.  We spent the night in Scranton and woke up the next morning to find that Boston was closed up tighter than a gnat's ass while they searched for the bombers.  Not good.  Mistress was due back in Boston from a trip out west for a seminar.  Would She make it back?  If not, who would we be working with?  Nothing like a little mystery to spice up the trip.  We were going to find out that afternoon one way or the other.

Sir and I didn't talk a lot about what was happening.  What was there to say?  We were doing everything possible not to go into this with any preconceived notions; that would only further complicate what was already a confusing issue.  The whole purpose of this trip was to try and "work the kinks out of [our] kink", as had been stated in "Shades of Kink". 

Monica and Keith got it exactly right:  When one walks through the doors at LaDomaine, one never knows exactly what to expect.  If you're interested in the particulars about LaD, the website is accurate. The descriptions are accurate as are the pictures.   

What will follow from this point on is told solely from my perspective. 

We arrived in the early afternoon and the first thing that struck me aside from the beauty of the location was the quiet.  The only sounds were birds and the breeze through the trees.  No sirens.  No trucks. No cars.  Just nature.  I remember thinking that the stars must be brilliant at night. 

You've probably read accounts (particularly in BDSM fiction) of submissives who encounter particularly strong Dominants and how they feel as though they could dissolve into puddles of goo.  I always thought that was poetic license.  Oh yeah, when Sir says certain things a certain way or touches me a certain way, I get a whole flock of butterflies and very nice tingles all over.  I can spot a Dominant right off.  There is just something about them, a sort of vibe they give off.  But, I swear, when Master and Mistress (She did make it back to Boston just before the city was closed down) came out to greet us, my first instinct was to bow very low; this is my oriental upbringing.  That didn't happen, but the desire to do so was there.  After the social graces were handled, we were escorted into the House. 

When I stepped across the threshold, the dynamic changed and I felt it immediately.  Before I even realized it, I had removed my shoes.  I felt something changing deep within myself I hadn't felt in close to 25 years.  Control had been very gently and subtly lifted, and I could feel something begin to (there is no other term for it) unfurl inside me.  I felt free. 

Over the next hours before and just after dinner (Master is an outstanding gourmet chef), I watched the dynamic begin to take shape. 

It was a little overwhelming to me being in the presence of three very strongly dominant personalities.  This was not a business setting.  I was not dealing with potential or current clients, nor colleagues.  I was not the experienced partner trying to instruct a less experienced partner. This was a place where I could totally embrace and revel in my submission.  And I did so without reservation.  It didn't take long to recognize the protocols.  There was a very strong Gorean influence and I picked up on it right away.  I didn't realize it at the time, but I was undergoing some very fundamental changes that were coming to me as naturally as breathing. 

The next 48 hours would completely change my life.

Next:  An emotional journey and a catharsis